I met with the egg donor coordinator. You may remember that last time around I fired the donor coordinator I was given because she screwed up so many times. I am no working with her boss. I am having a great experience with her. She was very helpful when it came to the donor embryo situation that I nearly had. She said she is so happy that we changed our minds and decided to try again. Actually, we didn't do it that way. It was all about the money. It still is. We refinanced our house. Horrible and scary to do so in the current market. I hope we don't have to move...ever.
I have to say that the stand out emotion I have about this cycle is utter terror. I am terrified about having another child. I see WW really slowing down, mostly mentally. I swear sometimes I feel like she's an 80 year old woman. She has a lot of aches and pains which are totally understandable given the havoc competitive sports have wreaked on her body. But it's a mental thing. I hear from her, "I'm too old for that." "Save it for someone with more energy." "I'm tired." I hear that last one all the time. It's like her enthusiasm is gone, she's mellow veeeery mellooww. the biggest, most obvious change is that she used to just jump up in the morning with enthusiasm and now if she gets up before me, she drags around for a long time. I don't know. she thinks it's old age (at 43). I think it's mostly mental.
I am 43 too. I have at least 30 lbs on her. I am shorter and weaker (meaning it takes more energy for me to open a jar and heft up the garbage bag into the trash outside) and I have not let the mental age rule me. Granted I do not have the physical pain, back pain, knee pain, etc. but it's the mental lack of enthusiasm that gets me. Tired. Old. Stagnant. Doesn't make a very good situation for a baby. They demand energy, enthusiasm, physical endurance. Just one of the many things rolling around in my head tonight.
It's late. My head is spinning a bit. I had my first Lupron shot at 7 am and my first hot flash at 3 pm. Ah, that's the life. Everything is on track so far. I know all the worrying is not going to make anything any different. I need to put it on the back burner. Focus on today.
I do have question for you...did you give up caffeine before a successful cycle? Did you do acupuncture? Did you do anything else that you believed may have helped with conception (if you have been lucky enough to conceive)?
7 comments:
You'll be more tired than a 20 year old, but you'll be fine. You just do what you have to do. I hear that stuff from my husband all the time, and he is a lot older than WW.
I'm trying acupuncture this cycle, and the acupuncturist suggested that I give up caffeine. I'm trying, really I am. Instead of a medium coffee on the way in to work, and a small coffee once I get there, and Coke Zero all day after that, I'm just going to try to stick with the medium coffee, and only on work days (because otherwise I will fall asleep while driving). Otherwise, it's diet A & W.
I don't need a lot of caffeine but I need some. So I refuse to give it up. I have a little bit, never more than 50 mg (one black tea bag). Since 150 seems to be the healthy limit on caffeine, i'm continuing w/my 50mg during my pregnancy. HA! My pregnancy. I can't believe I have one. Anyway: I have done acupuncture for all of my cycles and I believe in it very much. It's totally relaxing. On the feeling old thing, I relate: but i have noticed that I feel the oldest when I'm scared. If i start worrying about how I'm going to handle raising a baby and a kid, I immediately start feeling old and draggy and tired. You may be on to something when you think WW's issue is mental.
My SIL got pregnant with DE IVF at the age of 49 as a single woman. It's tough and she has a nanny to help her. (She had b/g twins.) So, it can be done. Like midlife mommy said, you just do what you have to do.
I'm sorry I have no advice on caffeine or acupuncture. I was never a caffeine drinker (even a little makes me jittery) and I have never done acupuncture. I think the most important thing is to do what feels right for you.
I'm 43, and my body is falling apart. But I am still thrilled to be the mom of a 21 month old, and I'd contemplate doing it again if it weren't for the fact that my OB said it might kill me next time (not kidding, but I'm a physical train wreck, not anywhere near the norm). And through it all, even though I'm tired, I love every single moment. Well, ok, I could have done without the spinning tiredness in the first 3 months when he never slept, but that passes in, well, 3 months.
I also have friends older than me who have had babies, sometimes twins or second ones, and they love it all and do it all. And who knows, maybe it will rejuvinate WW. And, if not, she'll still be there to support you and help you, and you'll be WW for the baby.
Ok, off my soapbox. Caffiene isn't great for some reason or other when it comes to conception, but I couldn't tell you why as I always ignored those lectures - I can't drink caffinated coffee or soda anyway.
Acupuncture rocks. It literally lowered my FSH from a 12 to a 7, but my eggs were so crappy (what was left of them) that the FSH ultimately didn't matter. Also I've had acupuncture get rid of headaches, stuffy noses, and even a nerve issue in my big toe, of all things. I was avid about it during my cycles, and feel that the increased blood flow to my uterus, as well as the calming influence, helped with my ultimate success.
Wordy today, ain't I?
I'm 43 and DP is 46 and we're managing so far with DE twins and our 5 yo.
Re cycle prep ... i did acupuncture and cut back on caffeine, took a good multi vit and chinese herbs.... and omega 3 oils. My acupuncturist also suggests high dose vit C
Good luck!
xxx
I did it all - yoga, acu, diet changes, mental imagery - you name it and nothing helped. Then I stopped doing it all and used DE and that did the trick. I am not a big user of caffeine, but did cut back some - usually having a few sips of dh's mocha each day.
I know this is really late, but I still wanted to comment.
I gave up caffeine and artificial sweetners on our last cycle. I did acupuncture for all three cycles, but only for the transfer on the last cycle.
I really think giving up the artificial sweetners was a big help. Interestingly it wasmy dentist that recommended that.
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