PMS and WTF?

I am cycle day 23 today of a 25 day cycle. Generally speaking, nothing amuses me. It's PMS and intensity time...my favorite...

Today I spoke to our donor coordinator. I let her know that all of the requirements on our side have been fulfilled and we are ready to go. She let me know that our ED (egg donor) came in for her final round of blood work today, which is her last bit of testing before proceeding. Because I am a type-A, Virgo, need to have planning and scheduling in my life to survive type person, we went on to discuss the cycle. I had been told originally that the cycle would start the end of June. Fine, good, I am out of town for 9 days but I was willing to re-arrange my entire schedule. Last week I was told that the cycle would be in early July instead (around the second week). Okay, I don't like that, but it's only a couple of weeks off the original date. Things change, right? I let it go. Today, when we got down to the particulars. When I heard the projected cycle dates for the two of us, it didn't add up. I KNOW that I do not have the knowledge necessary to put all this together so all I did was repeat back to her what she said to me, and it didn't sound right.

The Cliff*Notes are that we aren't going to do the cycle until August!!! WTF?? Again I say, WTF?? I asked her why the delay and she said something about this or that...I don't know. I was un-happy.

Me: Isn't there anyway we can move things along? We have everything ready to go.

Donor Coordinator (DC): Well, not really. If she was using birth control pills we could use those as our baseline, but she isn't.

Me (thinking): God I hope she's not pregnant already. They would know about that by now right? deep paranoia setting in

Me: I still don't understand why it will be until August?!? (trying to sound calm)

DC: Well, let me tweak the numbers and see what I can come up with. She has to have at least 17 days on the pill and not more than 21 and that puts us around August...(continues to mumble numbers to herself)

Me: Okay, when will you know what it will be. That's summer and I have to give my job as much notice as possible.

DC: I will call you next week when I know more.

I was so upset when I hung up. Yes, I know, these aren't my expiring eggs, but I am going to turn 43 in August and I just have a thing about it. I may be getting younger eggs but my body has to carry them and I would like to be able to still be somewhat energetic. Having a baby at nearly 44...I can't get my head around it. I guess there is some imaginary age line that it crosses for me. The waiting is hard, too.

I hope I am just reacting given the big dose of PMS I am on. I read through some blogs and thought that once I do have that little baby (hopefully) this will all seem trivial. Pathetically I even read about the women who delivered at 60 and 66, but it didn't make me feel better. Alright, time to look on the bright side. I will be able to do that in about 3 days. Ugh.